Our first was a drunken accident. Well, kinda'. I wanted kids, and was rather lax about keeping us from getting pregnant. As a young couple, I figured that if we waited until we could actually afford a kid, we would be 40. However, I certainly didn't plan on having him as early as we did... but.. we were married, it's not like I was knocking up my girlfriend. When we found out it was a bot, she got teared up.. She so wanted a boy, but of course we always said we would love our child no mater what. We eventually had a girl 6 years later using a method she learned on ivillage.com on how to have a girl... seriously, it totally worked.
When my wife was pregnant with our first child, I had a pretty good job, and we were closing on our very first house, which we had built. It was our little dream house. Just before she had him, I was informed that I would be laid off. So, to recap, losing my job, closing on our house, new baby on the way... such is life.
She chose her doctor because he was the kind who really gave back to his community. He had a little clinic and helped poor women with their pregnancies. We had good insurance, so when she would show up for her check up, he would have her come straight to the front of the line. He told the other expectant mothers in the waiting room "This woman has real insurance that pays, and that helps me help you, and that's the way it is". None of the women ever said one word of complaint. And he was a very good doctor.
On the night it was "time", we got to the hospital with plenty of time. She got in a room, and we waited. She wouldn't dilate. So they tried to induce labor. Hours and hours went by, she was so ill and tired trying to have this baby. I was by her side the entire 42 hours of labor. At one point she vomited on me, now that's love.
It was our first, and I really didn't know enough to protest that length of labor. But when I asked that the doctor be called, one of the nurses said that we were in their "lucky" room and all of the women who stayed in that previously had been able to give birth naturally.
Ok, here is the thing. I am like the Hulk in certain respects. I don't turn green, or get really big, or actually any of the things the Hulk does except snap and go off on people. And once released, I am popping rhetorical caps in all y'all's asses! It's not a pretty sight. My wife calls me her frightening pit bull that no one really understands... LOL.
So, things were said, and the doctor was called. She had an emergency C section. He was meconium and because of the prolonged attempt to get him through the birth canal, his head was elongated, he was 4 shades of purple, and his finger had put a permanent skin fold scar just under his nose . He had to spend the next day in intensive care. I video taped most of it.
In the video, you can see them take him out from behind the tarp, and me going up to my wife looking half dead and bringing her, her new boy. I cried, sniffed, and held her hand, and told her I loved her. Then off to the incubators.
When I looked at him, after his head snapped back to normal size, I could see myself in his face. I've never seen that before. It's really quite amazing. And since then, I can never, and will never be able to relate to anyone who doesn't love their children unconditionally.